Funny sms Messages

Girl’s Attitude?
when boy doesn’t look at her she says
KUTTA dekh bhi nahi sakta….
But when boy looks at her she says,
DEKH KAISE KUTTON ki tarah dekh raha hai…

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Cutest Proposal –
A Boy Rings D Door-Bell Of A Girls Home.
&
Asks ,
“Do U Belive In Love At First Sight
Or
Should I Come Back Again..”

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Sardar’s Friend: Yaar,
Last Year The Name Plate Outside Your House
Read Santa Singh, B.A.
This Year It Reads Santa Singh, M.A.
When Did You Finish Your Masters Degree?
Sardar: You Don’t Understand.
Last Year My Wife Died,
I Put B.A. To Indicate “Bachelor Again”.
Then I Took A Second Wife, So M.A. Is “Married Again”.

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teacher- ” why are you under tension? did you forget ur hall ticket?
tintumon- ” no”
teacher- ” ” ID or calculator..?
tintumon- ” no teacher, by mistake i bought tomorrow exam’s bit today…!!!

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Vari Varsi Khatan Gaya Si,
Khat Ke Leyanda BUTAA,
Tussi ratti sutte reh gaye,
Tuhaddi Chummi le gaya KUTTA. Oye Balle Balle Balle……

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samundar bhar syllabus hai,
nadi bhar padte hai,
bucket bhar yaad rehta hai,
mug bhar likhte hai,
chullu bhar marks milte hai,
jisme doob ke marte hai..

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Father: Beta tune college me sabse mushkil kaam konse shikhe?
Beta: Maine 2 Muskil kaam sikhe. 1) Dantoon se beer ki bottle kholana, 2) Tez aandhi main 1 maachis ki tili se cigrete jalana.hkil kaam konse shikhe?

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chand par kaali ghata chaati to hogi,
Sitaron mein Chamak aati to hogi.
Tum lakh chupao Duniya se, magar akeley mein
tumhe apni shakal pe hansi aati to Hogi.

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Apki ‘smile’ ne saara jahan hila diya,
Apki ‘smile’ ne saara jahan hila diya,
COMA se jaage huye mareez ko permanently sula diya.

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Aap itraate bahut ho dil ko behlate bahut ho,
Sochte hai apko Dinner per le jaye,
Par kya kare hamara iraada badal jaata hai,
kyunki tum khate bahut ho…!!

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Apne roop par itna ghuroor na kar,
sab 2 din ki masti hai,
Tera husn bhi tab tak qayam hai,
jab tak
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.Fair & Lovely sasti hai.

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You = cute
You = hot
You = sweet
You = intelligent
You = amazing
You = perfect
Me = liar

Dil ki yeh khawaish hai mein tere ghar aaon,

Tere ghar aaon,
Tere ghar aaon,

Baar baar aaon,

Har baar aaon AUR …

Bell baja kar bhaag jaon

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Premika–Ae bewafa tune sabkuch saaf kar diya mera dil jala kar rakh kar diya.
Premi–Teri kurbaani bekar nahi jayegi,bhej de rakh bartan majne k kaam aayegi.

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1 mulla ki shaadi nahi ho rahi thi, Wo mannat mangne gaya.Waha uski maa khai me dir gayi….Mulla bola__Ya khuda teri khudi, Apni to mili nahi_ Abaa ki bhi gawai.

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Bijli + Barsaat = Savan aaya,
Barsaat + Baaja = Dulha aaya,
Phool + Nazaare = Vasant Aaya,
Aap + Aap ki hansi = Bhaago-Bhaago Bhoot Aaya.

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Husband Wife ghumne gaye, raste me ek dgadha ghaas khata mila, Wife boli- O G Tumhara rishtadaar ghaas kha raha hain, Namaste karo.
Husband- Namaste sasur ji.
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5.Santa Banta se puchta hain,”Sabse bada challenge kya hai?” Banta kehta hain answer sheet ko khaali chod do aur last me likh do, paas karke dikha.
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6.D Best example f laziness
Boy- Papa 1 glass pani de do ,
Papa- Khud le lo, Boy- plz de do.
Papa- ab mango ge to thapad doonga.
Boy- Jab thapad dene aaoge to paani lete aana!

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A sardar ji pulled out 6 people from a burning house… still he was in jail…….why? coz all the 6 were fire brigade staff !

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* Suraj bana tu badal banay,chand bana tu taray banay,husn bana tu deewanay banay.kuch tu hai baat aap mai.yun hee tu nahi pagal khanay banay…:D

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* Boy: Jaaneman, is dil mein aaja! Girl: Sandal utaaroon kya? Boy: Aray pagli, yeh koi mosque thodi hai, aise hi aaja!

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* Roshni dayker doob jana koi suraj se seekhey.. Dil dai ker dard lena ki humse seekhey.. kuch na deyker Dil lena koi unsey seekhey.. SMS leker REPLY na kerna koi Aapsey seekhey

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* Kiya ap kay sir per seengh hain?no r u sure?plz check again.no ,ok no problem waqie Gadhay kay sur per seengh nahi hotay

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* aik bandar ka bacha apni maan say: maa main itna badsurat kyon hoon maa beta khuda ka shukar karo usay dheko jo message pardh raha hai

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* Bhul se kabhi hame bhi yaad kiya karo, Pyar nahi to shikayat kiya karo, itna bhi gair na samjho k baat hi na kiya karo, phone nahi to sms hi kiya karo

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* Hum dono main cute kon smart kon dashing kon sweet kon handsome kon yeh sab tum tow hoo nahe saktay tow bachaa kon…

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* Wafa Main Ab Ye Hunar Ikhtiar Karna Hai,
Woh Sach Kahe Na Kahe Aitebar Karna Hai.
Yeh TujhKo Jagte Rehne Ka Shauk KabSe Hua,
Mujhe To Khair Tera Intezaar Krna Hai.
Khwabon main ayenge SMS ki tarah.
Dil main bas jayenge ring tone ki tarah,

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* jam kerwa hai magar itna nahi k pia na jaye,
zindagi main dard hai magar itna nahi k jia na jaye,
sms kerny per paisay lagtay hain magar itney nahi kay kia na jaye;)

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New Examination Patttern in India (Revised):
General Students: Answer All questions
OBC: Write Any One question
SC: Only read questions
ST: Thanks for coming.
Cheers to Reservation

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Teacher class mein apne baby ko doodh pilate hue boli: Ale ale mela beta dudh p k doctor banega.
Santa: Mam! Thoda hame bhi pila do hum compounder hi ban jaayenge.

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World’s smallest resignation letter?

Respected sir,

I love Ur wife.

Thank you

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GIRL:My heart is like a mobile
and you are the sim card

BOY:I m very happy. . .
Gal:dont b too happy. . .
If I get a new offer
I will change the sim card..!

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A ThermoMeter is n0t the 0nly thing
that gets a “DEGREE” without having a “BRAIN”…! :p

A silent msg f0r all studnts;-)

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Ek shrabi sadhu se takra gaya. Sadhu: Oh murkh, mein tuje shrap deta hoon..
Sharabi: Ruko, me glass leke ata hoon.

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How do u identify a true music lover?
A man when he hears a woman singing in the bathroom and puts his ear to the keyhole instead of his eye!

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·  Ek Church k gate pe likha tha: Jo paap kar k thak gaye wo meri sharan me aaye.
Ek callgirl ne niche apna mob no likh diya: Jo nahi thake wo meri sharan me aaye.

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·  Ma: Beta ladoo Khayega?
Beta: Nahin
Mama: Chocolate?
Beta: Nahin
Mama: Khana?
Beta: Nahin
Mama: Marjana apne peo te gaya hai, sirf jutiyan hi khayega.

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Legal voting age-18 yrs
Legal marrige age-21 yrs
matlab sarkar v manti hai ki 18 ki age me admi desh sambhaal sakta hai par biwi nahi.

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Teacher : Correct the sentence, “A bull and a cow is grazing in the field”
Student : A cow and a bull are grazing in the field
Teacher : How ?
Student : Ladies first.

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Friend 1 : Where did you born ?
Friend 2 : India.
Friend 1 : India? Which part?
Friend 2 : No, the whole body.

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